Scary Movie 2

Directed By: Keenen Ivory Wayans

Starring: Anna Faris, Regina Hall, Shawn Wayans, Marlon Wayans, Chris Masterson, Kathleen Robertson, David Cross, James Woods, Tim Curry, Tori Spelling, and Chris Elliott

The original Scary Movie started something that is sadly still not finished.  The original filmmakers certainly lied when they said that there would be no sequels.  The fact that Scary Movie 5 is upon us speaks volumes about how wrong that statement unfortunately was.  We've been plagued for a decade with horrible spoof movies, and no end seems to be in sight.  While the first Scary Movie was definitely an enjoyable flick, all others have been a big load of crap.  Scary Movie 2 makes this abundantly clear.

Several years after the Stevenson County Massacre, Cindy (Anna Faris), Brenda (Regina Hall), Ray (Shawn Wayans), and Shorty (Marlon Wayans) are somehow alive and studying at college.  Their instructor, Professor Oldman (Tim Curry), is eager to study a paranormal presence at a nearby haunted mansion.  Oldman invites them to come to the house, commonly known as Hell House, for a weekend along with several other friends from the university.  With the help of his paraplegic assistant Dwight Hartman (David Cross), Oldman starts taking notes on them as soon as they arrive.  Of course, strange things start happening when they get there, and I'm not just talking about supernatural activity.

Scary Movie 2 is undoubtedly one of the worst movies of all time.  Spoofing films ranging from The Exorcist to Hannibal, director Keenen Ivory Wayans repeatedly mistakes grotesque, oversexed trash for genuine satire of classic horror films.  To make matters worse, the actors give some of the most atrocious performances through which I've ever suffered.  All in all, you'll be popping bottles throughout Scary Movie 2.  There's no other way to get through this crap.

With a horny possessed girl urinating and vomiting uncontrollably, the ghost of Hugh Kane (Richard Moll) having a one-night stand with one of his victims, and a giant cannabis monster rolling up Shorty and smoking him like weed, it's needless to say that Keenen Ivory Wayans has crafted a truly tasteless cinematic experience in Scary Movie 2.  While there are plenty of foul, disgusting moments throughout the film, none of them are really satire.  Does a possessed girl throwing up really parody The Exorcist?  Do ghosts who get their freak on really tackle The Haunting?  These are just gross situations with tangential elements of the original films.  Wayans offers no genuine satire, which should be the core of a spoof movie.  Ultimately, Scary Movie 2 is oversexed and underdeveloped. 

The performances from the cast are equally revolting.  I could talk about each and every cast member, but I don't have enough space on this page to do that.  Shawn Wayans brings his homosexual character Ray back to life.  In doing so, he manages to descend to new lows, particularly by having gay sex with a clown.  If that's not bad enough, Marlon Wayans' portrayal of Shorty takes black people back maybe half a century.  Bringing this dumb ass to life only solidifies stereotypes.  As bad as the Wayans brothers are, they're not the worst part of the cast.  That honor goes to Chris Elliott's portrayal of Hanson, the Hell House butler.  He offers one of the most revolting performances I've ever witnessed.  His antics aren't outrageously hilarious. They're just downright disgusting.

While Wayans and his cast are butchering Mystikal's "Shake It Fast", you should be jamming to a different tune, LMFAO's "Shots".  There's no way in hell you're going to get through this otherwise.  Scary Movie 2 gets a wasted rating.  Ask the bartender for some mystery shots on this one.  Make sure it's strong.